She Asked For It

I recently read a status on one of those idiotic university gossip pages saying,‘If you cant cover your body well, then dont blame him for staring you J’.

Now what does covering your body ‘well’ mean? I am perplexed by this question. Because I have worn shalwar kameez and I have worn jeans but I still see men leering at me. And this is not just my observation. Ask any girl and the answer will be the same. All the women in Pakistan could don burkas and still be subjected to the perverted gazes of some men.

Which brings me to my main point; it is not women who need to change the way they dress, it is men who need to change their thinking. Blaming women for making you stare at them is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard. 

 I see a plethora of men wearing shorts, tank tops or even roaming around shirtless in the summers (just go to Lahore’s canal on a sunny summer afternoon!) and what I don’t see is women gawping at these men. But how can that be? These men are not PROPERLY covered! How are women not staring at them? Do women, the inferior gender, somehow posses the super human ability to overcome their desire to leer at half naked men?

image is not mine

I am baffled. How does one decide who is sufficiently covered and if they deserve to be stared at? Is there a guidebook I need to refer to? Because women would very much like to know how they can get men to stop staring at them. You could be wearing jeans or an abaya and still be the subject of unwanted attention.

Even though I’d rather not go into religion because my issue is with society. I have to agree, yes, religion advises women to cover up. Yes, it does. No one is denying that. But where in our religion is it permitted for men to leer at women who are not ‘properly’ covered up? No where!

Basically, what I am trying to say is that, stop. Stop blaming women for all the problems in society.

Stop telling victims of rape, sexual harassment, assault and other crimes that it was their fault. It is never your fault. We need to stop this culture of blaming women for all the problems they encounter. This sad culture which instead of helping the victims, blames them for whatever tragedy has befallen them.

image is not mine

Let us all combat this mindset. Stop telling our girls to ‘cover’ up and stay at home and rather teach boys that females are humans. They are not objects. They are not toys. They are individual people with the right to an opinion and have to be respected.

So next time you can’t ‘help’ but stare at a girl, remember the problem is not with the way she has dressed, the problem lies in your own perverted thinking!